Recently I gathered my senses and decided for the 8hundred9th time to try to instill some valuesslashmoralsslashworkethic-s into my work-boycotting children.
As if I need to give you a reason. You're all like… gang sign Mom solidarity.. ROCK IT OUT DEBBY!
They have been picketing since the day they were born.
Their cardboard signs hung uponst their shiny lil' silver spoons.
WE WON'T WORK!
WE ONLY MESS UP.
WHERE'S MY RARITY PONY?
DON'T BRING US DOWN!
DOWN WITH DA MAN!
WHERE'S MY CEREAL??
WHAT'S A GARBAGE BAG!?
We just moved into our new home and we're finally settling down and "in… to" reality.
AND BY THAT …. I mean there are 32 cocoa puffs on my new kitchen floor each morning awaiting their rescue by my nimble hands before they are crushed into oblivion by one of 10 feet in this household.
WHAT THE MOTHA PUFF IS THIS ABOUT?
Are you celebrating children?!
Throwing brown balls like confetti to commemorate the 5th breakfast in our new home??
It's like the game of Operation…. reaching for each ball. My nimble fingers… reeeeeeeaching….. reeaching……for that ONE last ball….
Except I hit my head on the BITCHOFATABLE rather than get electrocuted.
So yesterday I installed a new system in our home.
The Miss Hannigan System.
You want to eat MORE cereal?
You'll sweep the floor you lil cocoa puff head!!
You want me to find your RARITY LITTLE PONY?
I'll show you PONYVILLE!
Whatever that means. Just stay with me.
Stop your yelling at me ( 4 year old) and get the cups out of the dishwasher if you ever wanna see RARITY AGAIN!
You want to play my AWESOME Mac computer???
EMPTY THE TRASH you lil MESSER UPPER!!
Yes. That is THE TRASH.
How do you pull it out??
PULL and then tie it up...
Like a SHOE. The red… those are the laces. Tie them.
She acted like she discovered a dinosaur egg.
SO COOL… THE GARBAGE BAGS TIE!!
FOLKS….I'm on my way to EASY STREET!
Don't rain on my parade telling me my 1/2 day of child labor will fizzle out in t minus 7 min. Shhhhhh.. hush now.
Now where is that booze bottle…