LOrd I have THE BEST job.
Look at this one.
Purposeful
Along with the vicious emotion that set in when I learned of Krista's plight---- I also somehow garnished this new ability to not be able to shut my mind off.
Purposeful.
This is a word used over and over in terms of her case.
She is in a coma.
She is unconscious.
She has movement and the ability to control her bodies functions for the most part.
But nothing purposeful.
Purposeful.
Purposeful.
Nothing that shows us that Krista willingly ---- and specifically ---- makes something happen on her own.
Purposeful.
I pray for it daily.
I say it over and over in my head.
I stare at my profile picture on facebook---- into her eyes.
Sometimes I stop typing and look up--- and she's there looking at me.
My throat closes. I hold my breath.
And I hear the words in my head...
Purposeful.
Depsite my best efforts--- tears stream.
I visit her when I can. I remain a cheerleader.
I stare at her in the quiet. While I play Harry Connick for her.
I stare. Every bit of her. I just stare and take in. Watching her " dance" the whole while.
She use to dance to Shoop.
Now she dances this odd " reaching " routine with her right leg and arms.
She almost knees me in the head several times.
I stare at her face as she turns to the side over and over. Like clockwork.
I note
How her eyelashes aren't very long.
How she has freckles on her cheeks.
How her teeth are so white.
I hold her hand.
Her fingers are clasped around splints… they are not the graceful , long fingers I once knew. They are beginning to peel and almost feel waxy.
My beautiful friend… is in a hospital bed and her skin is beginning to peel from it.
I growl to her… SAY SOMETHING.
SAY SOMETHING KRISTA PLEASE. USE YOUR VOICE.
YOUR TRACH IS GONE.
YOU CAN TALK NOW.
I gasp when she makes a sound. A muffled … low moan.
I then whisper. I know you're there
I KNOW YOU'RE THERE!!!!!!
I learn all of these terms. Glascow Coma Scale. Neurological --- rating scales. Awareness.
I begin to think of Krista as a number and then want to throw myself into a wall for doing so.
She is not a number on a scale.
She is Krista… who is silly and fun and so loving and who listens to freakin SADE and was made fun of it for.
My friend.
That I hugged goodbye in April.
She turned her head around and said " I love you debby " and kissed me on the cheek.
I endured a dinner at the restaurant we last met up at.
I went with some friends.
I had to put my head down at one point… overwhelmed for a brief second.
Why wasn't I more purposeful as a friend?
Be purposeful in your life.
It could be gone in an instant.
Or worse: someone you love could be gone with ring of a phone…
and you are left with your thoughts.
and you are left with your thoughts.
I'm magnetic….
Or at least I love to think of myself that way.
I attract all kinds of stuff and sometimes that's not good if you know what I mean.
This past weekend we took a complimentary ski trip thanks to a client of my husband's. We packaged all the kids up in the SUV along with Gramma and Broocie. How a 2 ton vehicle ---- becomes a sardine can. Is beyond me… but us Supah's … we rise to the darn occasion.
One hour later we arrived in the bitter cold of Seven Springs. Hustled the kids outside and up to the chalet dodging snowflakes and booger freezing wind. You know that kind?
Oh yes you do. You're my kind of crowd.
That's a rare phenomenon. The booger freezing cold.
We get up the stairs- have half the shit unloaded. Are all standing outside of the door….
watching…
waiting…
fucking freezing.
Watching DBD slide the keycard ..
over
and
over
and
over
and
over
and
over
and
over
and
over
and then turn it around
and slide the key card
I attract all kinds of stuff and sometimes that's not good if you know what I mean.
This past weekend we took a complimentary ski trip thanks to a client of my husband's. We packaged all the kids up in the SUV along with Gramma and Broocie. How a 2 ton vehicle ---- becomes a sardine can. Is beyond me… but us Supah's … we rise to the darn occasion.
One hour later we arrived in the bitter cold of Seven Springs. Hustled the kids outside and up to the chalet dodging snowflakes and booger freezing wind. You know that kind?
Oh yes you do. You're my kind of crowd.
That's a rare phenomenon. The booger freezing cold.
We get up the stairs- have half the shit unloaded. Are all standing outside of the door….
watching…
waiting…
fucking freezing.
Watching DBD slide the keycard ..
over
and
over
and
over
and
over
and
over
and
over
and
over
and then turn it around
and slide the key card
over
and
over
and
over
and
over
and
over
and
over
and
over
FUCK US if the cards didn't work.
The owner was in Vail. Col- o- fareaking-rado. ON A MOUNTAIN TOP . SKIING.
It was 10 at night.
With 3 little girls.
Booger frozen and uNhappy.
MADY had a chernoble quality meltdown in the front seat while we waited for a magic person to fly in on a magical carpet, land and let us in.
This did not happen.
So we drove down to the ski resort to .. make it seem like we were doing something when in fact we were desperately waiting for that return phone call from Vail Mountain Man.
While we were driving to the resort. Someone said-- -- those keys must have become
DE- MAGNATIZED.
somehow.
someway.
DE- MAGNeTIZED.
LIGHTBULB MOMENT for supah.
'DBD,' HISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSES supah.
OMFG YOU MO FO ASS FO MO FO!!!
YOU
HUNG
THE
CARDS
ON
THE
REFRIGERATOR
WITH
A
MAGNET.
And that was the beginning of our ski weekend.
I was stuck on baby duty. I guess somehow when she was born----- that was the short straw that I drew.
FOR
LIFE.
WTF!!!!???
HALFWAY through 3 meltdowns with her in the ski lodge I was wishing I was avalanching down the hill in true supah skiing fashion.
xoxox
Holiday Traditions For Supah~
What are your holiday traditions?
Mine involve opting to help other families rather than accepting gifts that I really don't need. I'm blessed to have a husband that makes a good living. I'm blessed to have a job that pays me to do what I love. I am blessed with three very healthy girls. So my family and I look for opportunties to give back year long as well as at Christmas time. It just makes us feel like we did something … when you feel so helpless.
Last year was Jaden's year with his Jingle Bell Auction. Last year was helping a friend's friend who was terminal from cancer. We simply provided some spending money for a special cruise she went on.
This year.
This is what I'm doing.
MaryRose has read all of my posts from day one. From when I was a --- just a… person writing.
She's watched my blog turn from Debby to .. Supah. And she's supported every single MOVE I've made for others.
Praying, hoping, participating.
All the while raising a son with developmental issues as well as feeding issues, while battling a crippling disease herself and worse that I will not share. When it rains---- it sure pours for some of these sweet families.
They were blessed with Kerrigan Rose 8 or so months ago--- but 14 weeks too early.
Her life hung in the balance for two minutes after she was born--- when her heart stopped.
God was deciding if it was her time or not.
He gave her back to them and she has BATTLED ever since. But she is a sweet darling. Sweet as can be.
Look at her!
Her family raised funds to help MaryRose and her family pay for the astronomical medical care and requirements she needed. And I missed it because I had some other personal things going on.. Krista, Ethan etc.
Now … just a few days ago they were devestated with a positive test for Cystic Fibrosis for this little doll. Their journey is just beginning.
So perhaps you are like my family and are looking for a way this season or anyday…. to give back.
HEre is her story.
http://kerriganrose.blogspot.com/
There is a paypal button as well and as always… dollars add up.
If you have information or an inspiring story to share with Mary… please do so by emailing me.
Supahmommy@gmail.com
And keep them in your prayers as they travel this road with Kerrigan.
I told MaryRose something that someone left for Krista----
If he brings you to it--- he will see you through it.
xoxoox
supah
Mine involve opting to help other families rather than accepting gifts that I really don't need. I'm blessed to have a husband that makes a good living. I'm blessed to have a job that pays me to do what I love. I am blessed with three very healthy girls. So my family and I look for opportunties to give back year long as well as at Christmas time. It just makes us feel like we did something … when you feel so helpless.
Last year was Jaden's year with his Jingle Bell Auction. Last year was helping a friend's friend who was terminal from cancer. We simply provided some spending money for a special cruise she went on.
This year.
This is what I'm doing.
MaryRose has read all of my posts from day one. From when I was a --- just a… person writing.
She's watched my blog turn from Debby to .. Supah. And she's supported every single MOVE I've made for others.
Praying, hoping, participating.
All the while raising a son with developmental issues as well as feeding issues, while battling a crippling disease herself and worse that I will not share. When it rains---- it sure pours for some of these sweet families.
They were blessed with Kerrigan Rose 8 or so months ago--- but 14 weeks too early.
Her life hung in the balance for two minutes after she was born--- when her heart stopped.
God was deciding if it was her time or not.
He gave her back to them and she has BATTLED ever since. But she is a sweet darling. Sweet as can be.
Look at her!
Her family raised funds to help MaryRose and her family pay for the astronomical medical care and requirements she needed. And I missed it because I had some other personal things going on.. Krista, Ethan etc.
Now … just a few days ago they were devestated with a positive test for Cystic Fibrosis for this little doll. Their journey is just beginning.
So perhaps you are like my family and are looking for a way this season or anyday…. to give back.
HEre is her story.
http://kerriganrose.blogspot.com/
There is a paypal button as well and as always… dollars add up.
If you have information or an inspiring story to share with Mary… please do so by emailing me.
Supahmommy@gmail.com
And keep them in your prayers as they travel this road with Kerrigan.
I told MaryRose something that someone left for Krista----
If he brings you to it--- he will see you through it.
xoxoox
supah
Google Words: Is Macaroni Kid a Scam?
Blogger has this awesome new stats system that I at least JUST NOTICED. It's not like they've invented the wheel… but they've at least begun USING the wheel as far as I'm concerned. ( it's ABOUT TIME)
So one of the options are the google key words.
ONE OF THE MAIN KEY WORDS:
IS MACARONI KID A SCAM?
I just think that's funny-- not because I think anything is funny about what they're googling. But BECAUSE I WOULD TOTALLY DO THAT MYSELF.
So I figured I should answer that question for those of you appearing here by some odd chance. Wondering if Macaroni Kid is a scam.
No .
It's not.
In any way.
There's no scam. No hollow lollipops. No timex watches marked as Rolex.
It's nothing like a Mary Kay business, a Jewlery business etc.
It's real and you can do it fairly easily.
WHAT IN THE WORLD IS IT?
It's a resource newsletter ( e newsletter) that you write for your local community , focusing on events that are happening. ( here's mine ) You publish it every week. You build a readership ( IT'S FREE FOR THEM) and you become a well known well respected source in your area.
It's a NATIONAL NAME. With over 300 local newsletters across the nation and internationally.
Moms, aunts, uncles, grandparents, college bound…. all publishing in their communities.
People just like me.
Driven, creative. Energetic. Social. Looking for SOMETHING , ANYTHING… to call their own.
This is ALL THAT AND A BAG OF CHIPS.
My area. We are TAKING OVER. We have SEVERAL MK's in the surrounding Pittsburgh area and we are all collaborating to make this the biggest baddest endeavor us " moms" have attempted.
I'm a mom -- just like many of you. I have 3 kids. My days are CRAZY. My house is a mess.
But I love what I do.
I make revenue on the advertising that is available on my AWESOME PUBLICATION that businesses WANT to appear on.
I meet tons of new people by connecting in the community. I have made incredible business contacts with such National Chains as Chick Fil A in my community.
I have gone from a mommy to a business person but haven't lost my mommy feel.
I do things on my own time, that benefit myself and my family.
There's no scam here.
The minimal monthly amount paid to the National Company for use of their name and the website with a team of programmers backing it is just that when you get down to the nitty gritty of this. Minimal.
I make enough money to cover that cost --- and still have money and perqs that make this job--
THE BEST EVER.
xoxoxo
supah
Email me and if you read this darn article and decide to give this a TRY .. Please. Tell them I directed you to them!
So one of the options are the google key words.
ONE OF THE MAIN KEY WORDS:
IS MACARONI KID A SCAM?
I just think that's funny-- not because I think anything is funny about what they're googling. But BECAUSE I WOULD TOTALLY DO THAT MYSELF.
So I figured I should answer that question for those of you appearing here by some odd chance. Wondering if Macaroni Kid is a scam.
No .
It's not.
In any way.
There's no scam. No hollow lollipops. No timex watches marked as Rolex.
It's nothing like a Mary Kay business, a Jewlery business etc.
It's real and you can do it fairly easily.
WHAT IN THE WORLD IS IT?
It's a resource newsletter ( e newsletter) that you write for your local community , focusing on events that are happening. ( here's mine ) You publish it every week. You build a readership ( IT'S FREE FOR THEM) and you become a well known well respected source in your area.
It's a NATIONAL NAME. With over 300 local newsletters across the nation and internationally.
Moms, aunts, uncles, grandparents, college bound…. all publishing in their communities.
People just like me.
Driven, creative. Energetic. Social. Looking for SOMETHING , ANYTHING… to call their own.
This is ALL THAT AND A BAG OF CHIPS.
My area. We are TAKING OVER. We have SEVERAL MK's in the surrounding Pittsburgh area and we are all collaborating to make this the biggest baddest endeavor us " moms" have attempted.
I'm a mom -- just like many of you. I have 3 kids. My days are CRAZY. My house is a mess.
But I love what I do.
I make revenue on the advertising that is available on my AWESOME PUBLICATION that businesses WANT to appear on.
I meet tons of new people by connecting in the community. I have made incredible business contacts with such National Chains as Chick Fil A in my community.
I have gone from a mommy to a business person but haven't lost my mommy feel.
I do things on my own time, that benefit myself and my family.
There's no scam here.
The minimal monthly amount paid to the National Company for use of their name and the website with a team of programmers backing it is just that when you get down to the nitty gritty of this. Minimal.
I make enough money to cover that cost --- and still have money and perqs that make this job--
THE BEST EVER.
xoxoxo
supah
Email me and if you read this darn article and decide to give this a TRY .. Please. Tell them I directed you to them!
Go into business with Supah--- Eversave and Kisses for Kerrigan
Hey Budget Blogger Wanna Make Some Moolah Friends… and help me raise money for a little baby girl born too soon?
Here you go: from moi.
Merry Holidayannaukawanzaristmas.
It's called eversave!
I doubted these things before friends… but they actually work. I COULDA BEEN RICH!! ALL THIS TIME.
GRRR..
Okay…
While you will not be able to but a pink cadillac… because I know you're all dying for one. You will be able to buy yourself something pink at least with the fun money you can pull in. Your blog has some space on it…you have the ability to post.
So let's DO THIS.
Make some moolah with me before your wallet is wiped out from the holidays. Sign on to be an affiliate! I have to sign so many people up and I LOVE to meet goals.
I'm also donating any percentages I get to my friend Mary Rose Gill's : Kisses For Kerrigan Fund.
Born 14 weeks to early and recently diagnosed with Cystic Fibrosis.
This seems an easy way to give back .
xoxo
xoxo
Supah
Details;
You will automatically be entered into a few cash drawings that Bree at breebee.com is providing as a thank you for signing on to be an affiliate with Eversave via this google doc, Eversave will also pay you 8% of any sales earnings. You can also opt to place an ad banner/button on your site. Eversave will pay $1 every time a new member enters their email address on the corresponding landing page. WOW! (Current Eversave members won’t be counted).
What is Eversave? They find us great finds (some with specific locations yet daily national dealsl) and they offer it to us for 50-70% off the retail price! AND, you don' t have to rush to decide, most of the deals have the option to buy within a couple of days! Whew!
For signing on as an affiliate &/or opting to host a banner you will also be entered into a few different CASH drawings! The more that enter the more cash we can give away!
To be entered to win MONEY via paypal the 1st step is to complete THIS GOOGLE DOC, in a day or two you will receive an email from Eversave with your links to complete the process or Bree, bree at breebee.com (check your spam).
The terms of each program, etc will be available at each phase. {it does not matter where you live, this is open to anyone but please not if you are outside the US}. EverSave will be verifying entrants that complete the affiliate sign on.
If you are already an affiliate you are not eligible for this giveaway. (but you can opt in for the ad banner)
Entry into this giveaway will end on or before 12/31/2010 11:59pm EST (ending is based on entries), drawing for cash prizes will be on 1/10/2011, winners will be selected from the google doc via random.org and notified via email who will have 48 hours to respond to bree@breebee.com or another winner will be selected. Thank you, Bree
From my seat...
Sitting tonight at the Bryan Adams concert 5 rows back I realized something.
I have ADD.
Pretty certain of it.
I couldn't even keep my eyes on that piece o hunk o man candy even when he was singing some of my very favorite songs. My mind and my eyes were wandering.
Are you able to fixate on one particular thing for long periods of time without drooling?
I can't.
So I was thinking during all of his wonderful songs some of the following; because I am nuts.
MY THOUGHTS:
I wish I could sing like that. But it wasn't meant to be.
I wonder if I'd have a signature move ---- like the one where he pulls his mouth away from the microphone during heavy singing…
I also wondered if he was sweating.
Are his jeans designer or did he buy them at the Levi's store?
I wonder if he has special jeans made?
Are they black? Black must be his signature color.
I wonder what my signature color should be. Definitely not purple.
I pondered whether or not his one leg was bigger than the other… simply because he tapped it more to the beat.
Then I wondered if someone shined his guitar because it was awfully shiny…. meaning shining in my eyes.
Then I wondered if his fingertips were softer .. or more calloused from all those years and summers of strummin on that guitar.
Then I wished I could feel his fingers.
Then I wished…. well I'm not sharing that .
I was wondering if his pianist was nervous.
If he looked for cues from Bryan.
Then I wondered if the spotlight ever pissed him off?
Cuz it pissed me off the few times it ran into my eyes.
Then I wondered if he noticed Bouncy Barbara in Row 2. Who was swinging her hair into her neighbors face. I wondered if he would forehead punch her if he was the recipient of that Bouncing Swinging Hair move. Cuz I would have.
I wondered how the bouncer got the message " NO CAMERAS' to scroll across his phone while he walked up and down the aisles warning us. Then I wandered why he was too lazy to fareaking say it out loud. All the other bouncers did.
Maybe he had laryngitis.
I wondered lots.
What I realized other than the fact that I have ADD , I'd never sing nor be as skinny as Bryan Adams…. was that everyone at a concert " views it" a different way.
For instance.
My sis. Viewed Bryan as the love of her life. Singing her songs.
My mom… while she loves Bryan as Nenny and I do …. she was looking at the instruments. I know it.
She's musical like that.
Me--- well … you know.
( see above)
I was also fairly concerned with the large amount of spit spraying out of his mouth …. that I could clearly see 5 rows back.
I was thankful I wasn't front row… no matter how much I'd honeybun him.
But everyone enjoys things, views them, sees them, immerses themselves in different ways. We all take something different out of life's adventures huh? Your Bryan Adams concert isn't necessarily MY Bryan Adams concert… and there's nothing wrong with that.
Look at me.
I'm Yoda!
GO AND VISIT Tooth Soap's ® really super awesome MENTION on MARTHA STEWARTS RADIO BLOG! I'm so excited I'm like a pointer sister!
LOOK AT US ON MARTHA STEWART RADIO BLOG!!
http://ow.ly/3irfo
LEAVE A COMMENT THERE!! 10 commenters will get FREE Tooth Soap!
I give it out. :) You might win!
xoxo
I have ADD.
Pretty certain of it.
I couldn't even keep my eyes on that piece o hunk o man candy even when he was singing some of my very favorite songs. My mind and my eyes were wandering.
Are you able to fixate on one particular thing for long periods of time without drooling?
I can't.
So I was thinking during all of his wonderful songs some of the following; because I am nuts.
MY THOUGHTS:
I wish I could sing like that. But it wasn't meant to be.
I wonder if I'd have a signature move ---- like the one where he pulls his mouth away from the microphone during heavy singing…
I also wondered if he was sweating.
Are his jeans designer or did he buy them at the Levi's store?
I wonder if he has special jeans made?
Are they black? Black must be his signature color.
I wonder what my signature color should be. Definitely not purple.
I pondered whether or not his one leg was bigger than the other… simply because he tapped it more to the beat.
Then I wondered if someone shined his guitar because it was awfully shiny…. meaning shining in my eyes.
Then I wondered if his fingertips were softer .. or more calloused from all those years and summers of strummin on that guitar.
Then I wished I could feel his fingers.
Then I wished…. well I'm not sharing that .
I was wondering if his pianist was nervous.
If he looked for cues from Bryan.
Then I wondered if the spotlight ever pissed him off?
Cuz it pissed me off the few times it ran into my eyes.
Then I wondered if he noticed Bouncy Barbara in Row 2. Who was swinging her hair into her neighbors face. I wondered if he would forehead punch her if he was the recipient of that Bouncing Swinging Hair move. Cuz I would have.
I wondered how the bouncer got the message " NO CAMERAS' to scroll across his phone while he walked up and down the aisles warning us. Then I wandered why he was too lazy to fareaking say it out loud. All the other bouncers did.
Maybe he had laryngitis.
I wondered lots.
What I realized other than the fact that I have ADD , I'd never sing nor be as skinny as Bryan Adams…. was that everyone at a concert " views it" a different way.
For instance.
My sis. Viewed Bryan as the love of her life. Singing her songs.
My mom… while she loves Bryan as Nenny and I do …. she was looking at the instruments. I know it.
She's musical like that.
Me--- well … you know.
( see above)
I was also fairly concerned with the large amount of spit spraying out of his mouth …. that I could clearly see 5 rows back.
I was thankful I wasn't front row… no matter how much I'd honeybun him.
But everyone enjoys things, views them, sees them, immerses themselves in different ways. We all take something different out of life's adventures huh? Your Bryan Adams concert isn't necessarily MY Bryan Adams concert… and there's nothing wrong with that.
Look at me.
I'm Yoda!
GO AND VISIT Tooth Soap's ® really super awesome MENTION on MARTHA STEWARTS RADIO BLOG! I'm so excited I'm like a pointer sister!
LOOK AT US ON MARTHA STEWART RADIO BLOG!!
http://ow.ly/3irfo
LEAVE A COMMENT THERE!! 10 commenters will get FREE Tooth Soap!
I give it out. :) You might win!
xoxo
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