1123 followers
then 1124
then 1123
then 1124
THEN 1123
then 1124
then 1123
Seriously.? Who is the SYBIL who cannot commit to me?? Heeeeeeeyyyyyyyyy SYBIL I don't bite. FREAKING JUMP SHIP or stay for the Pina Colada's OKAY?? But let's take a deep breath- AND COMMIT. If my marriage isn't enough to give you confidence in committing to someone like me, well then. I'm not sure what I'll have to do. IF I CAN COMMIT TO SOMEONE LIKE DBD FOR 10 YEARS PLUS ( 9 legally) then you can give me THAT DAMN FOLLOW!!!
still have cold feet?
SEEee those little lighted paths to the EXIT???
Go follow THAT.
SOCCER:
seriously - the horns.
I wanted to kill myself after watching for 4 seconds. It's worse than watching that Tom Cruise couch jumping shit from 4 years ago. * shudder*
It's enough to drive any anxiety ridden , pill poppin, no patience , NEVER GETS A QUIET SECOND for 18 hours straight. MOMMA to her GRAVE. ( no i AM NOT talking about myself.. pshhhhht )
HOW ABOUT we just clap using the sign language sign??
THEN maybe I can catch the action of the World Cup.
Today's Post:
So it's never okay to really grill your family on blogs- so I don't ever. But DBD is a whollllleeeeee nother story- so let's have a BBQ mmmmkay?
This weekend DBD made a foul foul mistake. I was throwing red flags down left and right.
we were having our weekly come to " Jesus" calm and orderly talk ( lie) and were discussing , not arguing nor flinging mud ( lie) some areas that need improvement. ( that i saw) ( in him. ) ( not me) ( lets be crystal clear k?)
I made fun of his " 5 hour long weeding " attempt. which pissed him off.
PEOPLE:!!! RIDDLE ME THIS...????
WHO WEEDS FOR 5 freaking HOURS???
someone using their FREAKING TOES OKAY??
Put some hustle in that BUSTLE!
HE TOLD ME TO WEED IT MYSELF the next time.
ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh : smack down
bring it on .
I made sure to let him know that I do PLENTY enough around here- including all of the cleaning slavery of every orifice of this house.
Unlike him.
You know what that mo fo said to me????
yah... like the bathrooms are clean.
ERRTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT- careen and veer off the expressway and come to a jerking stop on the exit ramp- turn around to KILL HIM.
* fast forward through an emotional breakdown from Momma Supah*
Pause: at this point.
Supah cleaned all 4 bathrooms at 11 PM THAT NIGHT- hands and knees. Medicine cabinets, under sink GROSSNESS AREAS - here there everywhere a clean clean.
you know how I cleaned up
BIG WHITE GARBAGE BAGS
You know what items were the first to make it into the garbage? Never to return?
Guess.
When he went looking to brush his teeth, comb his hair, trim his beard , shave, put deodorant on........... et. cet. er. a. et. cet. er a.
I directed him to his new toiletry bag.
oh wait. I threw that out too. :)
HE and sybil can SUCK IT. :)
Oh yeah.
And the big gay bag story?
Here you go. :) Its his agreed upon punishment :)
BIG GAY BAG STORY
27 comments:
You are such a crackup! I would LOVE to be a fly on your wall!
You go girl!!!! Have all the meltdowns you want!
FUUUUUUUCK YEAH, BOIII!!! Suck on that, hubby man. LMAO You are so effing awesome, Supah...want to come and set my hubby to flying right next? Pretty please? *bats eyes, makes pitiful pouty face* LOL I would have had the exact same meltdown, without the whole cleaning the bathroom part. That's his job, and he can do it his damn self. =) Loving your face today...thanks for making my Monday much less of a Monday!! ;D
OMG, the horns! As if the fire truck whistle sound my son makes that's at the right tone to make you want to gauge your ears with a spork isn't bad enough, my husband get an app for his phone that makes the horn sound. Then he plays it while I'm driving. WTF?!?
Husband rule #1 - don't ever mock your wife's cleaning skills. I would have made him carry the big gay bag, too!
lmfao!! thats awesome!! i have one of "those" on again off again followers too... wtf! haha
I'm sorry, but DbD looks so saxy carrying that big gay bag! DBD + BGB = Jenn's in luururrrve!
HA
I hope he learned his lesson and I hope you really threw out all his shit!
(sorry DBD, my loyalty is with my Biffy even if you DO look hawt with the BGB)...
I htink the follower thing is a goof with google I have the same thing only not quite as big a number lol.. 199 198 199 198.. Oh I would have KILLED him.. KILLED as in dead and Ihave places to hide the body.. want to send him here so this redneck birar patch ky gril can teach him some manners. Myhubby willhave him trained fairly quickly
HAHAHA! You gotta admit DbD looks better than Mchayhay with the Man Purse! You go DbD, you got my vote!
Supah!!! How are you stranger??
LOL Way to go!
Dh said something to me about the kitchen the other day and I screeched "well then, DO SOMETHING about it." Like I'm the only one who can clean.
I let the boys eat the whole dinner that night and didn't leave anything for him.
ohhhhhh....that's a hefty fine DBD!!!!
Bad bad bad....
This was seriously some of the funniest schtuff I have read in awhile. I was cracking up and the boys were all like, what's so funny mom?
I said A MAD MOMMY threw away her daddy bathroom stuff cause he said the bathroom wasn't clean. Kooper shook his head and saaid...bet he won't make THAT mistake again.
Bwahahahaha!
i'm so glad someone else finds those horns annoying! OMG I can't wait until it's over! My husband has it on anytime he can and I feel like beating my head against a wall. Sometimes, I wake up in the middle of the night to those HORNS! Seriously, enough is enough! I'm glad i'm not alone! Your post made me crack up! Have a great Monday!
You go Supah :)
The first year we were married, my hubby made the mistake of criticizing the way I washed/ironed/hung up his pants and shirts. I told him I wasn't his mama and he could do his laundry his damn self! I'm back to washing his stuff now, but you can bet he doesn't fuss about it now...
OMG, you crack me up. Glad I found your blog. Following through MBC. The white trashbag is oh so common in our house as well. Hubby fears it. Rightfully so. Many things end up in that bag, never to return again. (she said smiling).
I love love love that you pulled out the trash bag...and used it! You rock!
The soccer horns. Yeah. My daughter decided last week that soccer is her new favorite thing...for hours at a time. Please come to my house and dislodge my eardrums so that I don't have to hear it anymore. Thank you.
I think your hubbs and mine both took Arsehole pills. I have been having the same problems. And did I mention he is on vacation till the 10th of July. Lawd, help me!
DBD looks like Big Sexy with the Big Gay Bag! It goes so well with those camo pants!
I literally needed to take a break from reading this to wipe the tears from my eyes. "A person who weeds with their toes". OOOOH, AHHHH, OK, I did read the rest and then you put the picture with the bag. Oh my word. Chris is lookin' at me weird.
DBD is getting a head start on year 10........
And I agree with Angel. My numbers have been going up and down by one. Either that or we all have the same idiot following/unfollowing...which is entirely possible.
LMAO. U seriously need your own reality show GURL!!! This stuff is priceless. U ALWAYS make me laugh no matter what. ;)
HA! Thanks for the laugh tonight!
I gave you an award!
http://carissa8402.blogspot.com/2010/06/feelin-love.html
You would think after 9 years of marriage, he would know better! Maybe he was jonesing for a new man bag and that was the fastest, easiest way he could think of to get one!!! Anyway, you are a SUPAH Genius!!!
oh.
my.
word.
you are so hilarious.
and so dead on.
who the heck weeds for FIVE HOURS!!??
{except someone who weeks with their toes… bwah ha ha ha, that was CLASSIC}
lmao... you are a trip. your posts make my mornings!!!
OMFG~ I love it! I so wish I could be a ghost in your house so I could see the everyday bickering!
You have FOUR bathrooms? Jealous!
Love the big gay bag!
Perfect! I'd hug ya if the interwebs would let me.
Walked into the bathroom to find Little Duck swirling the water in the dog's water bowl with a toothbrush. I'm training her up early.....unfortunately it was MY toothbrush. Minor detail really....next time I'll be sure she has the correct one.
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